Every year since we were married, Bryan and I have taken a "Marriage Retreat" in January. This is a weekend for planning for the year - our budget, our vacations, our house projects. We also have time set aside to talk about how we can be a better couple - and now, parents. Plus, we are out of the house - no chores, no pet projects, and (sometimes) no tv! This wasn't an original idea; one of the couples we met with before we got married suggested we do this, and we simply heeded their wise counsel. This weekend is a non-negotiable in our marriage - we do everything we can to make sure nothing stands in the way of this time.
Last year, Lee went with us. Logistically, we were not yet able to be away from him for two days and two nights (read: I was still his primary food source). This year, Lee had his first weekend away at Pawpaw and Mimi's house. He loved it! They loved it! We loved it!
Yes, it felt strange to be in the house without him; we haven't been alone there for over a year and a half! But, once we left and went to our retreat destination, I was reminded of what it was like to be without Lee. We didn't look around the loft and wonder what needed to be baby-proofed. We left things lying around. We slept in! We made a big yummy breakfast, hung around in our pajamas, held our sessions without interruption, and topped it off with a steak dinner.
One of the unexpected outcomes of the retreat this year was that I was reminded of myself. I love to read, I have hobbies, I want to travel. I love to hang out with Bryan! Sure, Lee is a huge dream that came true, and we desire for God to increase the size of our family. And, no, I didn't really forget who I am before this weekend. But sometimes, it is hard to access the true personality of Amelia. I am just thankful that I was reminded, so I can make a better effort of pulling her out of the woodwork of our home more often.
2 comments:
I love the idea of your couples retreat! Good for you guys. And Amelia, I completely understand how it can feel so good to be reminded of yourself. I think many of us Mommys forget to put ourselves on the list! I was behind on my blog reading and just saw your post about Lee's finger! So sorry that he (and y'all) had to go through that. But glad to hear he got the tip of his pinky back. Let's try to make a playdate in the new year:)
XOXOXO
Christine
amelia, NOTHING is more important for lee than to see the two of you in a strong, thriving marriage. their security stems from the two of you loving each other - studies have shown that he perceives your love for him to come out of that...not b/c of how much you show lee you love him. how often we forget that fact...we focus so much on loving our babies. we often put off *loving* each other & ourselves b/c of that. we shouldn't. have date nights, leave him w/ grandparents, & continue to put your marriage ahead of your parenting. your family & the kingdom will prosper b/c of it. looking forward to our playdate (hopefully it's soon!). xoxo
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